Real life Black Mirror?

Friends.. I know it seemed that I had abandoned you. But I have not. Last year.. sucked! Sorry. It just did.

Let’s turn to the topic of today. Why does salad in a bag turn so quickly? Remember that one episode of Black Mirror where produce goes bad almost the moment you get it home and you aren’t allowed to grow your own?

Well.. I am starting to suspect that Farmers have found a way to make produce go bad a lot quicker. I my salad pre-made in those bags. I get it home and think I can eat on this for the new several days. However, 2 days later.. it’s already starting to turn.

So how does this work?? Do the farming association have nano-bots in the food with an internal clock that automatically knows go bad after 48 hours?

Is this some sort of attack by plants in revenge for cutting them down? Are they trying to poison us by turning brown and rancid? How will they attack next? Will they come together and form a creature like in the original The Thing from Another World? Will we have to resort to self-defense by electrocuting all of our celery to prevent it from stalking us??

Is it a Government conspiracy to keep us hungry and pliable?

Or is it the same old arch-enemy…. Aliens?

Leave me a comment and let me know.

The Head Duckie.


Can we talk about something here?

Okay.. I know this might be a ‘hot button’ item but I really feel that I need to say this…

People! Stop with wearing so much perfume/cologne!!! The lightest amount will be fine! Spritz it in the air and walk through the mist. But for the love of all that is good in this world… stop spraying it all over you!!

I do really believe that some people actually marinate in the stuff over night! I can smell them coming and still smell them after they leave.

News Flash! That much smell makes many people nauseous and gives them headaches. Not to mention the people with asthma! They can’t breathe! That means that you are making people sick! And who wants to be around someone that makes people sick?! No one!

It will not leave a good impression to meet someone, and that person has to hold their breath or risk death! We don’t all have gas masks to walk around with in case of emergencies!

“Are you my Mummy?”  (for Doctor Who fans)

If you want to impress or attract a person.. causing them to asphyxiate before you’ve even walked over to them won’t do it.

Less is more, people! Unless it’s chocolate or kittens/puppies. To eat some chocos and then snuggle some kittens or puppies… as much as possible!

-The Head Duckie


The road so far..

Okay, I believe I told you all that the house had flooded due to the washing machine being an asshole.

Well.. we have finally moved out of the hotel and back in the house. But we are currently living in Box-city! They had packed up everything to move out while the house was being painted and the flooring replaced.

But wait! There is more fun!

On June 21st, I was driving to work in the morning when my car was totaled. There was a big truck in front of me that suddenly changed lanes. A head-on collision happened! There had been a deer running down the road (opposite traffic) and the truck was big enough that I could not see it. When I saw the truck suddenly change lanes.. I said “What the.. “. That was all I could get out before the collision!

So, this year… to recap: My old phone died and I had to get a new one. The house flooded and had to have repairs done (that took from March 30th to the last week in May!), and my car was murdered by a deer.

Hey 2018?? Bite me!


-The Head Duckie

The road so far….

The road so far:


March 30th, the house flooded. This was due to the washing machine malfunctioning and just pumping out water. I did not know it was doing this until about a half hour later. By then, it was too late and the water was in every room!

We had a company come in the next day to start the process. They ripped up most of the carpet and flooring, set out dryers (27 of them) and several 3ft high humidifiers that pumped out heat. (we had to have the a/c off.) For 7 or 8 days, the house was above 94 degrees and never dropped below 94.5. The last couple of days, Dad and I stayed at a hotel..kitty went to boarding. We went home once the machines were picked up.

For several weeks, nothing happened. They just kept sending people out to re-measure everything.

The Tuesday of the week of the 15th, I left work for a couple of hours. I went to help Dad pick out flooring. We picked out carpet, tile, vinyl and wood.

Then.. nothing until Monday 21st.  We have moved into a hotel (kitty back at boarding) for 2 or 3 weeks. ( or so they tell us)

Since all this, there are things that they boxed up that we can’t find. I’ve tripped on one of the dryers and re-hurt my knees. My travel time got extended a bit more. (I now have to beat trains or get stuck)

As of the 9th or 10th of June, the workers have finished the painting the walls. And the flooring has been going in. They said they will finish the flooring this week 6/11 to 06/17.

They should be able to starting moving the furniture and boxes back 06/18.

We hope to move back in the week of 06/18 to 06/23. And I am hoping to get Kitty out of boarding (aka Kitty Hotel).

Kitty should be really excited… whole new flooring he hasn’t thrown up on!


-The Head Duckie

New stressors: Floods and Phones

This will be a rant. Allow me to apologize right now. I am sorry.

Okay.. here has been the breakdown of what has been happening over the past month to month 1/2:

At the end of March, I did what I would normally do when I got home from work on a Wednesday night. I threw of load of laundry into the washing machine. Now what happened next is not normal!

When doing laundry, you can choose whether or not to have a small, medium, or large load. The machine will fill the water to the appropriate amount and begin working.

That mechanism failed. And the washer just pumped out water.. everywhere! I did not notice this for about half hour.. by then the water had spread to every room in the house!

The next day, we had a cleanup company come in. They set out 27 large blowers, about every few steps they had one there. They pulled off most of the baseboards and most of the carpet/flooring. (Actually, they said they were replacing it all, so I don’t know why they didn’t pull it all up.)

They also set out several 3ft tall heater/dehumidifiers. One for every room. And 30 minutes after I got home… I tripped and fell over one of them. (ouuuccchhh!) They then said we had to have the a/c off. So, this created a constant temperature in the house of at least 94 degrees or higher. It was … living hell!

In truth, after one night.. we should have put the car in boarding and gone to a hotel. But we didn’t until Saturday or Sunday. I can not exactly describe the sheer bliss of the air conditioned hotel room. Of taking a shower and not be sweating before you reach the bathroom door!

We were able to have all the machines removed and the a/c back after a couple more days. Since then… nothing! They keep going back and forth with the insurance company. And sending more guys out to re-measure the whole house.

Now this has been the state of things since then. We received $$ from the Insurance company, and have finally heard from a lady to come and pick out flooring. This has been over a month waiting for this.. with the house ripped up and the cat trying to lick/eat fluff off the floor!

Now.. I have been working overtime to make some extra $$. Just in case. And that just in case popped up. My much beloved iPhone died on me 2 days ago. I had to order a new one using a credit card that I had just paid off!

After receiving my new phone, I was in a good mood. That is until a co-worker decided that she needed to add to the above stress.

She is not ‘higher ranking’. She is just a co-worker. We are at the same level in the company, we both have the same skills/authority to do things. Just after my Supervisor and Team Lead left.. she suddenly instant messages me asking do I need her to give me work to do. Now, I can route my own work. In fact several of us have taken turns in staying until closing to make sure all the work is assigned! Some might try to say that she was just ‘being helpful’. But the only way she would even feel the need to ‘help’ me is if she feels that I can not handle my job. That she can needs to.

Lets face it, if one of the other Team leads went to my Team Lead and said: “Do you need me to give you work? What are you working on? Are you working on ____? Do you have enough to do?” He would be somewhat insulted. And rightly so.

So the headache I’ve had all day is … ‘fun’ and now because of this.. my shoulders are scrunched up and tight.

Uhh… gee thanks?

There! My rant is over!

Y’all survived it all! Yay! You rock! Thanks for hanging in there with me!

-The Head Ducky!

It’s not another post

While driving to work, I noticed this sign out in someone’s front yard:

“Massage Therepy”.

From what I gather from this ‘ad’, you get taken to the back yard…to their shed..

Now I ask you.. what could go wrong from going to a stranger’s house, being taken the a shed in their back yard for a massage?!

– The Head Duckie

Can someone get me..

For the past month, I have had to go to a Laundromat for wash day. This is due to an issue with the washing machine deciding it wanted to become a waterfall and spilling vast amounts of water out… flooding the house.

Now.. in the best of situations, I am not good at peopling. I just get sooo uncomfortable with large amounts of *people! So going some place where.. none of us really want to be is adding to that. But I must have clean clothes! (no one wants this to plod about naked! )

I have seen a few things at the ‘mat that would normally make me want to run away. But last Sunday, there was a man that came in with his family. He’s one of those that just can’t seem to sit quietly.. always having to make some sort of noise. Be it signing, whistling, etc.

He also came in with quiet an impressive cough. And he never covered his mouth. Now I admit that I am something of a germphobe. I can’t even imagine what all people walk around with. (Yes, I include myself in this.) But when you are so blatant about spreading illness.. that is where I draw the line. I am not quite sure why he felt he had to be there. With the Wife and kids all there.. they could have handle the laundry themselves.

But I have noticed this at work too. I am surrounded by 4 people who hack and cough and.. don’t try to prevent themselves from spreading this.

Now all this leaves me with this…

Can someone get me Hazmat suit??

– The Head Duckie

Just a quickie

Okay, this is not going to be a real post. I just thought I’d post something funny case you needed it.

One day last week, my Dad was driving through the neighborhood and he saw what looked like a squirrel in the road. (I know….. this is a trigger for some. I promise it will be okay. )

When the squirrel did not move as his car approached, he thought he’d get out and move the poor thing out of the road.

Annnnnd…well… the squirrel was not dead… he was just warming himself in the sun…

Let’s just say it was a confusing time for both of them!

Be safe out there!

-The Head Duckie



For some reason.. this one never posted. It’s one I wrote in February! Well… here it is now.


Okay, I know! It’s been a long time since I posted. I started one on NYE.. but I stopped to drink, watch fireworks, then watch a horror film. Sorry.. getting tipsy won out. Plus, I looked at the screen and thought “Whut r werds?”
I did want to pop in and ask Y’all to do me a favor. Please, please, please…. Do not walk around at night, in black clothes.

Seriously, what is wrong with these folks?! Do they have a death wish?! I don’t wish them ill nor am I trying to insult people. But c’mon on!!!!
You go out jogging/walking, to better yourself. To be healthy.. good on you! Well done! Go you! But please just have the kindness and good sense to wear light clothes! Put some reflectors on your clothes..carry a flashlight… something!!!
It’s not asking too much to stop making it easy for us drivers to run your ass over!

It just seems like self preservation would kick in and you’d want to be noticed for drivers to avoid you. Now, I know I am not much into exercise. If you ever saw me, you’d say I’m obviously not into any sort of movement. And that I have no place to make a comment. Now, I believe that it’s up to good ol’ Ma Nature in regards to your survival. But I do not have any wish to be arrested for involuntary man-slaughter! Please don’t create the situation that this would happen. I’m not built for prison life. #wimp #coward

In short, please just try to be seen out there. We all love Monty Python’s ‘How not to be seen.’ segment.. but that is not a good guide for night-time jogging. Just wear some ‘loud’ clothes and you will be safe enough. Well… at least from my driving..

– The Head Duckie

Can we just stop?!

Hi kids! I just want to ask something of you and of this world. Can we just stop making fun of others who have a medical condition? For years now I have noticed people on social media, on stand up comedy, on TV.. all making fun of people who have medical issues they don’t have. As the people doing the bullying don’t believe these afflictions are real, they feel the need to pick at others for having them. Saying things like “Just shut up already about this. It doesn’t exist!”

Now I ask you, would you do this to someone who has cancer or AIDS? No? Then leave others alone! So you may not have depression or anxiety, that doesn’t mean that it doesn’t exist. If someone says they have RLS (Restlessness Leg Syndrome), I believe them. It must be torture to want to sleep, need to sleep and not be able to stay lying down. Have Celiacs? I believe you. The pain in your abdomen feeling like something is clawing its way out..horrible!

So why do people mock and shame others. If they say they can’t eat bread or some other foods… don’t shame them. If someone has insomnia, don’t laugh at them saying they just are just making things up for attention.

Just because you don’t have this issue does not mean it does not exist. There are millions of conditions out there in this world. They are real, and people are suffering with the symptoms. And the last thing they need is to have other people mocking their suffering. I myself suffer from frequent headaches and migraines. These are real. The pain is real. (I have a doozy of a headache as I type this.)

It pisses me off to no end when I see tweets or Fb posts making fun of the very issues I have. Who are they that they can laugh at my pain and discomfort?!

Lesson in sympathy kids, know that everyone has a pain they carry…never mock others for theirs.


The Head Duckie